Rio: Christine Lagarde, today, welcomed the replacement of Irish Minister for Snideness, Michael Noonan, with the lovable, if vocally limited, Maca Paca of In the Night Garden.
"Of course, this is a good thing for Ireland, for Europe and for the world. I, personally, got on very well with Monsieur Noonan. He is a very genial, diplomatic and democratic person, in a very European way. If I say jump he says how high, (on behalf of the Irish people, of course). I always found this charming about him. Please see below a photo of myself, Monsieur Noonan and my brother, and well known vampire, George Osborne. George, is always one for lightening up the situation.
He had just proposed that we two, kick out every one of Michael's teeth, to help with the Eat Cock, Live Free initiative, currently being adopted in Ireland.
Voila, Mr Noonan's reaction! he epitomses all that is good and right in an EU citizen. having said that however, Monsieur Maca Paca is that little bit more docile than Monsieur Noonan. Yes, we found it difficult to believe that such a person could be found but yes, it's true. Monsieur Maca Paca can only say, "Maca Paca, Maca Paca" in such a charming way that it reminds me somewhat of Monsieur Noonan's beautiful refrain, "We must work with our European partners" or my personal favourite, "There will be no question of burning the bondholders" . Maca Paca is that bit more limited though and so he is an even more perfect EU citizen than Monsieur Noonan and therefore, our preferred choice to represent the Irish people as their Finance Minister. And of course, they look so alike, we really won't be able to tell the difference when we all sit down together to work out what we're going to do with those crazy Spicks. Europe begins in the Pyrenees you know."
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