Tuesday 7 June 2011

Irish Government: Delighted with News that Pat Cox is Next Irish President

Rio: Enda Kenny simpered today,
"Nothing apart from Riverdance and Darby O'Gill can get me wet, (of eye), like the sheer beauty of the generosity and kindness shown to the Irish, again and again by our EU and IMF friends.
We were, obviously, worried about where the money was going to come from to pay for the Presidential election and then, our bestos, the EU called us this morning and told us we needn't bother our pretty red heads with it at all, at all. We can keep the money and give it straight to Deutsche Bank because they've democratically chosen the next President. Even better, they've chosen another of our bestos, Pat 'The Maggot' Cox, to do the job. How better to represent Ireland that with a man who's so full of Real Democratic European pride, that he might burst at any minute? Heaven forbid that he would burst though! May the the Holy Virgin and all the Saints preserve him. He's a man with real conviction and flexible with it. He's joining Fine Gael now because he knows we, as he, have the best interests of the Irish people at heart. Now that he'll be our head of state we can be assured that things will be a lot more democratic round here. I'm weeping now, at the Irishness of it all. It's bleedin' deadly, isn't it? as the Dubs say"

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