Wednesday, 14 March 2012

Sarkozy Denies Charge Of Nouveau Racisme- "I've Always Welcomed Bigotry"

Rio: Alarmed at Nicolas Sarkozy's  apparent change of fortunes in  polls this week, both French Socialist and National Front politicians, have accused the French President of nouveau racisme.

"Immigrants Have Horns On Their Heads"
Front National hopeful, Marine Le Pen, screeched, "This man has no racism pedigree. He can't just waltz in here, coming over all Nazi, rant a bit about immigration and then assume the bigots' throne. I am the only true fascist in this village!! Johnny come latelies like this should be ashamed of themselves. I have a family history of spite and hatred built upon years of racist toil and struggle. He doesn't even mean this racist stuff. He's playing to the gallery"
Francois Hollande, the Socialist Party candidate, laughed, "He is a fool! His anti immigrant policy is just rhetoric. It's badly thought out and it will be proven to be weak and meaningless soon enough.  I will be announcing my own racist policy later in the week. Mine will be multi-directional and much more sophisticated. I am sure when the public sees my racist policies, Mr Sarkozy's recent bounce in the polls will evaporate. I mean we had a negro-maid raping gent in our party, can he say the same?"
Mr Sarkozy appeared angry when confronted with the claims of his presidential rivals, that he is merely feigning racism. " I am and have always been, a committed racist bigot. I have committed several hate crimes in the quartiers difficiles. I am not at liberty to describe these events as under our current anti- French laws, I would be arrested. I really hate lots of people. I hate black people most, obviously but I also hate Spaniards and Greeks. I am, what one might term, a Renaissance Racist. I am best friends with Europe's greatest fascist, Angela Merkel. No one can deny my racist credentials and retain their own credibility. Besides that, my wife, Carla is terribly beautiful and she wants me all night long.Need I say more?"

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