Shock: Queen Goes GaGa -Lashes Out at Irish Queen

Rio: The Queen, in a nod to the current Queen of Pop, Lady GaGa, wore a dress made entirely from popcorn at last night's banquet in Dublin Castle. Irish Queen, Mary Mc Aleese was resplendent in Royal Blue until the Queen attacked. Other guests at the dinner were shocked when the 85 year old, soon to be Pontiff, launched herself at the Irish Queen, tearing at her dress.
" She was screaming and shouting, 'Royal blue, royal blue, how very dare you, you Mick bitch' , reported a guest who wished to remain anonymous.
Another source said, "She clawed and tore at the front of our own Queen's dress, people were crying until they realised what our Queen had done. The New Maturity means we should all understand, we must keep in line with Royal etiquette. Our Queen wore the wrong colour, she's not a real Queen, like the real Queen. She deserved what she got."
The front  and sleeves of the Irish Queen's dress were hurriedly repaired by an unknown but very beautiful woman, using safety pins and sellotape. Enda and the Queen publicly reprimanded her before the dinner began, calling her a Mick spacunt.

"Everyone at the dinner breathed a sigh of relief when we saw the repairs made to the dress.", another source said, "although it did look shoddy and puckered round the breast area"
The dinner continued with the Queen, amazingly, saying two words as Gaeilge. So grateful was Enda, that he got the entire County of Cork to surrender to the Queen. She regranted the entire County to Lord Farquahar. To punish the Irish Queen for her gaffe, nobody clapped when she said over a thousand words in English.