Enda Kenny To Receive Marcéhal Pétain European Of The Year Award From Grateful Germans Tonight

Rio: Tonight, in Germany, Taoiseach Enda Kenny will receive his well deserved, European of the Year award from some top ranking Germans.

 

Enda Kenny. Just One In A Long Line Of True Europeans

 

 

A powerful German elite type, who was instrumental in conferring the award upon Mr Kenny, Heinrich Anschluss, said prior to the awards dinner tonight, "The award is so justly deserved in Mr Kenny's case. No European leader, since Marechal Petain himself, has been quite so European, so accommodating, so decisive, so firm in his judgement of what is correct for his people. We named the award itself in honour of Marchal Petain as we feel he embodied all that was good about Europeans. He took the necessary tough decisions. He knew the French needed a firm hand. That they had lost the run of themselves prior to 1939 and that someone had to weed out the undesireables in French society in order to help it back to a more orderly growth pattern. So accommodating. So European. We see these admirable qualities mirrored in the character of Enda Kenny. He takes a firm stance. He has realised that undesireables must be weeded out. He's cut their allowances, taken away their education programmes and taken away their healthcare. It's what must be done and he has done it. Other European leaders have not managed to repress their populations in such a European way. Enda is a God amongst rats. He has, without a doubt, been the single most important factor in keeping the European dream of rule by bankers alive. Would that all leaders, other than German ones, were like Enda Kenny"

Head of Deutsche Bank, Hermann Von Kristallnacht, another of Mr Kenny's supporters simply chuckled, over a glass of Cristal "Tanx Inda".
Editor of the German banking industry's leading magazine, Franz Leider-Koch, praised Mr Kenny,
"He's the ultimate European, so compliant and so far seeing. I am so looking forward to meeting him tonight and for us all to get to know him better. We admire him for his strength of character and his editorship of The Irish Independent. Additionally, we have been told by Mr Sarkozy, amongst others, that Enda gives exceedingly good head."